Embrace myself

Today I feel pretty fresh and energized from have been down for almost a month

The past month due to several reasons I was in a very low tide, a bit depressed even, and lost the motivation and direction

I am happy and proud of myself even in the bad time I still have kept practicing my yoga, do my daily chanting, and read even sometimes I was not concentrate

Through these daily practices I slowly to see it and understand clearly the meaning of all these experiences .

Today through encouraging a friend of mine makes me feel thankful for all the difficuties I have been through and thankful for being who I am , for having these shortcomings, just because these weak points so I have the chance to step on  my own journey of transformation through the difficulties I have been through and overcome and hence to encourage the people who has the similar situations.

I really expect myself can be the person who can bring the people /world around me hope and courage, be the person who can repay a kindness .

When things fall apart

我又掉進了我的地獄
什麼都沒有

i feel pain when i think of you said you wanted to kill yourself
I feel pain when i think of your pain of missing your daughter
I feel pain when i think of I left you on your own


start doing anything
yes, my brain know that but my heart doesn't want
I just don't want to do anything
I only want to lying on my bed  ratten

I want to see clearly the meaning I met you
I want to know why you came to my life but couldnt stay
I want to understand why we love each other but we can't communicate at all

I am so lost again
all the doubt come back again
should I continue my study?
should I go home?

I am still expecting someone can show up and save me , help me
maybe that's why I keep encounter difficulties